Sunday, January 16, 2011

After Almost Three Weeks

 My father called me this evening and by the tone of his voice I knew it was good news. He was pleased to announce that he is finally coming home. A part of me drifts away, like a melting glacier, when he's not here at home. I feel so off, completely out of it. And that's just him a few miles away. I can't imagine him in another dimension, in another state of being. Its catastrophic, just the thought of him leaving permanently. But you always have to pinch yourself and snap the hell out of it. Face reality as much as you accept everything else in your life thus far. Huge kazillion (as my five year old says) thanks to the staff at Hermann on Fannin for just doing what they do. I might have the heart and the charisma but I don't have the guts do all the cynical things they do. What they see on daily basis is a real gut pincher. So kudos to all of you. I actually asked one of the Rn's a personal question. It's personal to me because I have seen my dad in very critical conditions, sometimes he's hooked up to 8 or 9 different cords and ivy's, a real life eye squirmier if you ask me. A scene from a sad sad movie in other words. "How do you do this everyday?" (caressing his hand, while he is completely unconscious) "I don't know, well I do. . . I love when they get better, I like being a part of that, I love when they get a chance to go home to their families." I didn't answer her back. I just couldn't get rid of the knot in my throat. Some people were just born with that gift. Others were born with other just as great qualities. I just feel very blessed, entirely blessed for everything in my life. Thank you. Peace.
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2 comments:

TC. said...

God won't let you down P. He hasn't.
You are b l e s s e d.

PQT said...

xoxoxoooo :)