I typed this entire passage to my cousin earlier today. I felt like I was blogging over IM. It’s outlandish how I lose myself when I write. It started with one sentence and then I couldn’t stop. I’m a wreck when it comes to writing; a car without breaks.
What I’ve learned from my previous relationship, and from what I have observed these two years that I’ve been alone, from other surrounding relationships, is to never make something out of nothing. Take it for what it is. If it's just a friend you fuck, well then that's that. If it's complicated and he's seeing someone else and your aware of it, then you call the shots and decide if you want to put up with it or not. If he mistreats you verbally or physically, how much more will you put up with? If you’ve fallen for someone else while you’re currently with a person, always go with your second choice. Because if you were truly in love, you would never ever, ever, had your options open and allowed another person in. It’s always about choices, your choice. And the best way to a clean relationship is to be honest. Always. No matter how bad it seems or is, the truth is critical. A commitment should be honored. Not used as "Oh damm you’re committed to her or him?" They make a commitment seem so drastic. It’s a blessing to have a person who is true to you, a man or a woman who is faithful. I just learned so much. And I'm thankful for everything that has happened. Good or bad. Crap, I feel like I’m blogging here. I’ll stop. Lol
Yes, I instant messaged all of this to her. It was part of our conversation, the shoe fit perfectly; I didn’t hesitate and sported the hell out of it. I feel better now. Peace.