Sleep Less Night

July 23, 2012

I started writing for many reasons and then I just couldn't get my mind off of you. And till' this day it doesn't seem very real. I wasn't here for your viewing or your burial and it kills me, like great fucking timing God. Yes I'm upset with the man upstairs. It's not fair! It just makes things that much worst.

I took that night for granted. Instead of sitting there with you at the bar I was too fucking worried about the guy next to me. Why didn't I take the time to hug the living shit out of you? To embrace that million dollar smile? Instead I chased out of there to make sure he wasn't upset. I should have asked you a million and one questions. I should have celebrated life with you. I should have stayed with you longer.

And now I'm left with unspoken words and solitary embraces, and fucking regrets. For once I regret not doing more. I will never have the chance to hold you again. I will never hear your outspoken voice again. I will not get to awe that beautiful smile of yours. I'm sorry I wasn't there for you that night. I'm sorry I wasn't there for your services.

My heart will never neglect you in that way ever again. I'll always care. Please do shine over us from Heaven. And I can't wait for the sweet day I get to tell you all of this in person. I will always look for that brighter day. I love you Will. Shine brightly. Watch over us darling. I know your up there laughing at us with P. Take it easy on us. Peace.

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